Zero Suit Potential

The End of an Era

2009-03-21T13:00:00.002-04:00

Budget Gaming: 5.1 Dolby Digital + Pro Logic

2008-10-04T14:46:00.002-04:00

Money tight? Only have a paper route? Want to get your woman off the streets and still enjoy quality sound all around you? This cheap alternative to a 5.1 Receiver with Overpriced Speakers is the way to go.

Purchased Items:
Tritton AX360 5.1 Headset - $99.99 at Buy.com
Logitech Z-540 - $50 Approx.
Extra TOSLINK Digital Audio Cable - $10

The Tritton AX360 is a wonderful device. It is no coincidence pro-gamers and sound enthusiasts recommend this headset. The headset itself features 3 high quality speakers in each ear. For added bass, the headset will actually rumble. This gives a neat immersive feeling when playing action games. It also features a microphone with a high quality build. The mic is bendable and adjustable to fit any shape or face (barring disfigurement). It even has an adaptor to use the mic on an Xbox/360 controller. The headset also features volume adjustments conveniently on the chord relatively close to the headset itself.

The headset is all well and good, but the goodies that come with it make it a steal. It comes with a mini receiver box which has ports for TOSLINK and Coaxial 5.1 Digital Sound. The headset plugs into this as well as the PS3/360/device you want high quality sound from. Simple and easy, you now have 5.1 Sound.

But that is through a headset, for only one person to enjoy! The rest of the family, friends, or guests can be included thanks to the AX360 mini receiver. In addition to the already mentioned ports, it also has 3 mini jacks as seen on many PC sound cards. One for the Center/Subwoofer, the Right Front/Back, and Left Front/Back.

Plug your inexpensive set of speakers into the receiver and be ready for 5.1 surround! I suggest the Logitech series of PC Speakers. A great 5.1 set of speakers can be found for prices of $50 or less. As of posting, the Logitech X-540 System is $50 at Circuit City.com. A great buy. These speakers are actually an upgrade from the Z-540s I have, which are no longer sold.

In addition, it would be wise to buy an extra TOSLINK cable, due to the fact Tritton's included one is rather short and flimsy. But $10 is $10, and it is unnecessary.

The AX360 can be found on ebay or sometimes for cheap on Buy.com. It has been down to $78 shipped on Buy.com several times. I have seen it go for cheaper on ebay.

Tritton AX360 - $100
Logitech X-540 - $50
After Rebates Final Cost (High Estimate) - $150

Snag it for cheaper and enjoy!

Some may say, "Why not just buy a cheap Sony or Phillips system?" Well the dealbreaker is in the headset. Why get a shoddy receiver with low quality speakers when you can get a very high quality 5.1 Headset and midrange speakers? The reason the speakers are cheap, is the lack of a receiver. These speakers don't need a receiver because the sound card on a computer can handle it: these are PC Speakers, now much more versatile.

Final Note:
To get the Microphone working on the PS3 you have to buy:

USB Sound Card - $5 on eBay, $20 at Radioshack

2.5mm (AX360 Headset Mic connector size) to 3.5mm adapter - $5 at Radioshack
3.5mm or 2.5mm extension cable - $10 or less at Radioshack
-Extension is just in case the default cable is not long enough (it won't be)

Game Boxart Reviews: Madden 09 All-Play

2008-09-05T22:01:00.002-04:00

There are boxarts in the gaming world which dazzle us with beautiful art, some that make use question our own existence which such artistic integrity, and then there are ones that combine it all into one amazing package in the cut throat world of game packaging. One box art that has made me look into the depth of my life and examine who I am is that of Madden 09 All-Play for the Wii. It features the lovely and talented Brett Farve in all of his glory. To give you an idea of the greatness I will soon decipher, here is the boxart in it's uninterrupted glory.

This cover shows our old friend Mr.Farve pointing and laughing. As we examine this masterpiece we might note the differences of this cover from the other covers of this same game on different consoles. But as we do that, our thoughts soon drift to questioning why this event is taking place. What is he laughing at? Why is this making him laugh? We ignore the pointing, since the laughing is the same as the object he is pointing at. We can point at anything, but it takes something special to make us laugh. It is then that we soon begin to ponder in detail why he is laughing. But as we wonder that, we look at ourselves, why do we laugh. If we can understand why we laugh, then we can understand why Brett is laughing. I begin to think of things that make me laugh. First thing that comes to mind are things from Family Guy that go on too long. It takes a brevity of comedic greatness to have something happen for a prolonged period of time in a show. As I think of Peter grabbing his knee for 5 minutes, I begin to burst out laughing. I then think of Youtube Poops. I ponder how they can achieve such greatness. With Windows Movie Maker they string to together clips of the same show and play the same words over and over again while string things together to sound like a sexual innuendo. Again I am consumed with laughter.

This practice brings me no further understanding of Brett's situation, but his laughter challenges us to examine us and our senses of humor. No small feat. I realize now that Brett's laughter and the reason is not important, since the cover is supposed to bring about reflections in all of us. I would be lying if I said I am not still puzzled and intrigued by the source of his laughter, but it must be hilarious, or Brett wouldn't be laughing in the middle of an NFL game. Nothing is more serious than the NFL. Just ask Tom Brady.

Serious.

Fall 2008 Anime Preview Part 2

2008-09-01T14:19:00.000-04:00

Today I bring you part 2 of my highly coveted anime preview for this fall.

Gundam 00 season 2- Apparently the first one went well enough to justify another. I've heard a lot of mixed things about the first one but hopefully this series doesn't go as badly as Seed: Destiny did after Seed provided a decent Gundam revival. I don't wanna go into to detail of what it's about since that'll contain spoilers from the first one, but if you liked the first one then go watch it.

Toaru Majutsu no Index- This show is one which features a city of superhuman students and magic according the picture above. That gives me perhaps a magic school show vibe which is always a lot of fun, but as I read on I see our hero Toma has a hand which negates all magic. So perhaps we have a guy a with a god hand beating people up in the vain of Fist of The North Star. To further distort things, he meets a nun from the Church of England. I'm lost. I never thought I'd see a God Hand show with Anglicans, but now I stand corrected. If the show features Henry VIII I will watch, if it doesn't I won't. It's that simple. I need wife slaying and syphilis in my anime

Kurogane no Linebarrel- A guy gets hit by a falling satellite and goes into a coma and gains powers and then joins teams with a giant robot named Linebarrel. Anime is known for crazy concepts, and this show is more proof. The guy in the picture looks like Kaiba from "Yu-gi-oh!" but other than that I have nothing to say about this show other than a guy alongside a giant robot reminds me of the Iron Giant, but this sounds completely different. Gonzo is involved which could mean just about anything, but this doesn't seem to be in the same neighborhood as their more well received shows like Full Metal Panic, Last Exile, and Welcome to the N.H.K.

Edit: I take back what I said, this show sounds awesome, any guy who fights alongside a giant robot is awesome, so therefore this show is awesome.

Ga-Rei Zero- A guy who can see ghosts and a girl who can summon things team up to devour spirits. I'd like to say they are spirit detectives, but I don't wanna compare this to Yu Yu Hakusho, although there are similarities to be had. Hopefully this show doesn't kill itself by being too long like that show. I also like the jumpsuits, kind of gives off the Ghostbusters feel along side the ghost hunting, although I wouldn't wanna compare that movie to a mediocre sounding anime.

Tales of the Abyss- The Tales series is a very generic but enjoyable JRPG series that rescues itself from the terrible, preachy stories with a fun battle system and multiplayer gameplay in an RPG. This show will adapt Abyss which is painfully mundane game in the series into an anime series. It's not an OVA like the Symphonia anime was, but regardless you can expect Luke to whine and the plot to plod on while the side characters to inject comedy as the only positive aspect of the show.

Today in Class 5-2- A few years ago 5-2 was adapted into an OVA which was funny and full of pedophilia. Now they are looking to make it into a series. The show follows Saito and his childhood friend Chika through daily elementary school adventures where kids will feel each other up while trying to find something comparable to the feel of a cat's paw, or walk in on each other naked without meaning to. The OVA covered the manga so the show will probably have some original content which will be pedophilic in nature. The show will at least be funny, but if you are expecting the holy grail of lolicon fan service, you will be disappointed since Japan's censoring has gone up considerably lately. For an example, watch Kodomo No Jikan, half the show was censored whether it needed to be or not.

Nodame Cantabile Paris Chapter- Another sequel for the fall, Nodame and Chiaki have overcome being incompetent idiots and fears of airplanes and are now going to Paris to pursue actual, fulfilling careers in music. The show will feature more classical music set performances and Nodame being loud and crazy, which is sometimes entertaining. Chiaki is a cool guy and the only good music elitist I've ever seen. Most music elitist tell you classic rock is a good genre and they are different for liking it. The same can be said for Metal and Punk Rock. Fuck that man, Chiaki listens to nothing but Beethoven and rips on people for playing the violin slightly wrong, that's a true music elitist. Listening to rock music doesn't make you more informed, if you wanna be a true elitist, just talk about classical, even if you don't know anything, saying something will make you look smart as hell and they will drop their Led Zeppelin and underground metal albums in admiration for you.

Fall 2008 Anime Preview Part 1

2008-08-30T19:47:00.000-04:00

With October around the corner, and September starting, the new anime season is drawing near, and finally we can add some new shows to our watchlists. This season seems to consist of a lot of remakes and sequels, but there are enough new shows with some talented industry legends to keep things from looking the same.

Tytania- A show that is based off of some Japanese novels from the late 80's. You are probably wondering why anyone would make an anime based on 20 year old books. I wondered that initially, but the director is Ishiguro from the original Macross and the books are by the same author who wrote the Legend of Galactic Heroes novels which are immensely heralded and the same can be said for the anime of the books. So with that author and that director, the show looks to be good. It's considered a space opera which Ishiguro has done great work with in the past, so hopefully this turns out good. I'm expecting a good start much like Macross Frontier, but I hope this show stays consistently good unlike Macross Frontier which has its only merit existing in its music as the show winds down.

Xam'd- This show is coming out in Japan now after two months, but regardless, it's already out on PSN here in America. The show is only on the list since its Japanese PSN debut is going to be during the Fall anime season. I've heard good things, so if you haven't yet, look into it. Not to mention digital distribution is a big step for anime in America as opposed to the 40 dollar DVDs we've had shoved down our throats for the longest time. At the very least support the idea.

Shikabane Hime- A show about an undead girl trying to slay demons in order to gain a place in heaven. It sounds strange, but it's done by Gainax, so it should at least be interesting. It's gonna be a two season show containing 13 episodes in each the Fall 08 season and the Winter 09 season, much like Minami-Ke last year, so I'm guessing someone thinks it will do well to give it a spot in two consecutive seasons.

Hotoku no Ken- Here we got some more Fist of the North Star, apparently told from another side of the story. I don't know much of Fist of the North Star outside of the crazy violence and the awesome song "You Are Shock", but I expect this to be over the top, hilarious, and very manly. If you're gonna watch this, I'd make sure to see the original first, since this show will have heavy fan service sprinkled in as one of the reasons to watch it. Otherwise don't bother, fan service is useless if you aren't in on it.

Michiko To Hatchin- A story of a hot chick who escapes from prison only to meet a girl who escapes from her parents. Together they will experience zany antics and such. The Samurai Champloo team is involved which is all people need to hear to give it a chance. Watanabe won't be directing but will be involved with music among other things. The show with its staff and premise will consist of episodic episodes with the characters having their pasts explained through flashbacks. Sound Familiar? That's just a guess, but that could play into the Bebop formula, minus the action and Yoko Kanno. Time will tell how this goes.

Casshern Sins- This is a show about a cyborg in a post apocalyptic world with robots who are responsible for the world being like it, and his fight to stop them. Nothing new here, but the costume has a bit of a sentai thing going on, and the plot sounds like Blade Runner, which could form an interesting and humorous combo. It has some funny ideas despite being generic sounding, however it's based off of an older anime, so if it pulls off the classic feel well alongside the Blade Runner thing, this show could be entertaining.

Edit: The hero from this show is slated to be a playable character in the recently announced Tatsunoko Vs. Capcom coming to arcades in Japan in the near future.

Yozakura Quartet- This is the story about four friends. It so happens three of them are girls and have super powers, and one of them is a guy without powers. They try protect the city as only teenagers with powers can while going through normal high school situations. I'm guessing there will be a substantial school part of the show and perhaps the show will deal with harem comedy elements, but based on what I've seen that might not be the case. The manga has been brought over by Del Ray, so perhaps I should read it, but the show could shape up to be ok if it doesn't take itself too seriously. However, if it goes into melodrama, I wouldn't bother.

Blog Updates: 8/4/08

2008-08-04T13:57:00.003-04:00

I changed the layout a bit. I figure these things are temporary until a much more appealing and robust template is implemented. In addition, went through and fixed most of the tags.

New rules for the blog to ensure Quality Control:
3 tags or less per post. Attempt to use tags already created.
Do not post 1 sentence posts. Give them some content and use.
From here on out, blog members must discuss big changes to the blog.

This post will be deleted upon comment from each member.

Blast Process Gaming: Kingdom Hearts

2008-08-04T11:48:00.007-04:00

Blast Process Gaming is a new game review article format written by Mr. Game And Romance. In Blast Process Gaming I will review a new game I have begun to play. This will usually amount to one sitting time. Eventually, a full review after completing the game will be posted. The contrast created by the review of the beginning and the completed product will provide more incite as to whether or not the game is worth investing time into.

---Very Minor Spoilers Below---
Only a very brief part of the game will be discussed.

I am not a Square-Enix fan. I like very few anime. I am not a 'Weeaboo', like some of our staff members.

That said, I did give this game a chance. I wanted to enjoy it.

The game is Kingdom Hearts for the Playstation 2.
Originally released in March of 2002 in Japan, September in North America, and November in Europe, Kingdom Hearts brought many Disney characters together for the first time in a videogame. Not only that, but it also brought the anime stylized Square-Enix characters.
The game received fairly high scores, anywhere in the 8-10 range, and good sales to many demographics due to the celebrity vocal cast.

I had heard such great things about this game, but also bad things. Things like "The combat system is dull." to "Most amazing quotes ever!" So I went in expecting bad gameplay, but nice story telling... Something Square-Enix has a track record of when it comes to real time.
I am playing on the Playstation 3 60GB model, with smoothing, 24" 720p LCD. This is for graphical references and playback issues that may not be found in other set ups such as the 80GB Ps3 or PS2.

I pop the game in, start a new game. Immediately I am impressed with the "dream" sequence and unique story telling. The Disney references make the child in me happy as well.
I picked the Shield and Wand off the pedestal. Playing with the Sword seemed like it would just make me a generic blade user. Then the game throws you right into basic combat and even a 'boss' battle. The pacing at this point is exceptional. Graphics seem rather nice, very clean with only a small amount of jaggies. I can't confirm if this is the PS3s doing or the game itself. It doesn’t look next gen, but it looks nice and stylized. The controls for the combat work well enough. Especially since Magic seems to be coming later in the game.

Then the character 'wakes' up. I am on an island full of kids. Neat, a kind of Gilligan like feel and pretty happy go lucky. Sort of like The DOG Island for Wii, with less sniffing. Even the characters are sparring with me and doing mini battle minigames. Okay. Now that I'm done with the exploration of the area... what do I do? I have to gather several supplies and do a tedious race. The race wasn't too difficult, took a couple of tries. But it wasn't fun; the controls made it wonky. The character feels floaty when he jumps. Now I'm gathering more supplies.
At this point, I'm extremely bored and the enjoyment I was getting from the earliest part of the game is gone. I returned to the XMB ending the first sitting.

Overall, if I was not told by several friends to continue playing the game because the quality and pacing increases as the game goes on... I simply would have stopped playing and given the game back. What was Square-Enix thinking with this part? An awful training sequence? Is this what is in store for the rest of the game? The player goes from such an exceptional sequence to a painfully boring fetch quest.

If this doesn't pick up, expect a harsh review upon completion of the game.

-Game And Romance

A sign of the generation

2008-08-03T22:44:00.008-04:00

In the recent weeks since E3, a lot has been made of the two groups of gamers. Those being the "Core Gamers" and the "Casual Gamers". The rise of the casual gamer has been very apparent, and has transformed gaming from being a hobby that was considered uncouth to being one which most people share in some capacity. Not to say gaming has become something you tell a girl about a party as a way to woo her. As this has taken place, the interns and lowest ranking journalists at their respective places of work have scrambled to write articles about old people playing Wii Sports as if it matters. These articles have approached the level of annoyance commonly seen in your average article about Web 2.0. The only thing holding the retirement home Wii party articles back from that lofty throne is the fact that they lack the misinformation of a Web 2.0 article. This is only because writing an article about the Wii at a retirement home requires no research. However at E3, these journalist returned to writing about gaming once more, and the subject matter remained the same.
As this happened, Internet message boards turned into livejournal entries and G4 continued to quote Internet jokes for no apparant reason, but that's not related to the matter at hand. The message boards whined about the lack of games for core gamers and how the casuals were ruining gaming. These people are right, but just the fact this caste system has evolved and how people have begun debating this issue left and right really shows how low gaming has sunk.
If the main issue at E3 is about the games coming out but rather the direction of gaming and the tier system that has developed, you know that gaming has fallen. There were some games at E3, but most were underwhelming and gave people little to talk about. To make matters worse, last year's E3 was just as bad. When 2 E3s bring about nothing but groans, it is a great indication that things aren't great. E3 used to be the best week of the year for most people who play games. Since it became press only and the date got moved, it's been a shadow of itself. E3's success is a great barometer of the health of gaming usually in terms of quality of the games and the ideas thereof. This year's E3 showed nothing but rehashes of established music game franchises such a Guitar Hero and Rock Band, and more Karaoke games, including one by the man behind Gitaroo Man, showing the calculated nature of some of gaming's greatest minds. Along side the music games being thrown at people, we saw more Wii peripherals, more Wii games without a concrete point to them, and more ripoffs of some of the positive aspects of the Wii. The Wii continues to sell well, so now other companies are following suit with their ideas. We now have Mii ripoffs on the 360 which was rather amusing. It seems like everyone wants to share in on the Wii's success. That system started out with promise and some great ideas and then plummeted by making games that abused motion control, but not taking advantage of it. The games themselves lacked any kind of good ideas but were easily accessible for most people to play. Some of these games sold absurdly well. The most prominent was Wii Play which is ok, but it's not something that should override more worthy projects that companies may attempt. However, Nintendo has put Wii Music and Wii Sports Resort out in center stage, while Microsoft throws out an eyetoy clone alongside Uno and the afforementioned music games. These games being prominent and showcased made many people angry and feel like gaming has passed them by for the first time. However, E3 wasn't the first time this has been displayed. In 07' cookie cutter party games were thrown out on store shelves for the Wii while everything else was a Guitar Hero clone or a shooting game. The top games of 07 were nothing but shooters. FPS isn't exactly a bad genre, but it reeks of the mediocrity that plagued early 90's platformers that weren't Mario and Sonic. Not to mention the top games of a certain year shouldn't belong to a single genre. 07' was undeniably the beginning of this mess. 06' had many great titles and ended with the new systems having launch titles that provided hope for the future. 07' delivered few games, bad games, and shooting games. 08' continued to build on that trend, and E3 showcased this as the trend for the time being.
As the weeks pass since that abysmal E3, everyone seems to be debating the direction of gaming as well as the people who play them. If this is the topic of discussion, what does that imply about gaming? If the biggest gaming event of the year fails to show anything remotely entertaining or interesting, what does that imply? No matter the implication, it's ok, we got Animal Crossing, what more do we want? But until then I'll keep playing Mario Kart and Super Smash Brothers.

-Token Weaboo, Dashed Siamang

Earthbound and the Path of Man: Part 1

2008-08-03T21:08:00.007-04:00

Earthbound, as truly all of you should know, is one of the best games ever created, easily reaching the level of "art" that so many other games reach for and miss. But what makes this ancient JRPG art, you ask? Simple. Earthbound connects the player to an intricate storyline that parallels the human life both individually and globally.

Ness: The Child

The story begins with the young boy Ness having a destined meeting with a small bug, Buzz Buzz. Ness is told that he will do great things in his life, and only he can stop the evil that is overtaking the world. Up to this point, Ness has had a very normal life, living with his family and friends in the peaceful town of Onett. Ness, Buzz Buzz, and several insignificant characters travel for a short time, fighting monsters. However, Buzz Buzz protects Ness and his friends from any possible damage, making sure that they reach their destination intact. When they arrive at that destination, Buzz Buzz is killed; Ness and his friends are left on their own.

Ness and his friends started in childhood: they lived a happy, carefree life with little to worry about. Meeting Buzz Buzz was their school years. Buzz Buzz was their teacher, and guided them through the dangers and wilds of the outside world, protecting and helping them all the way. When Buzz Buzz was killed, Ness and his friends entered the realm of adulthood. They had graduated from highschool and were forced to move on with the rest of their life, where they were no longer protected from danger. Ness left his friends and family behind to pursue the role that he believed he was destined to fulfill. Much like school teachers tell children they can achieve anything they want, Buzz Buzz had instilled Ness with the belief that he could achieve the impossible, because he was a very special boy.

Ness's growth mirrors the transition that every boy makes to becoming a man, and every girl makes to becoming a woman. In my next look at Earthbound, I will uncover what it actually means in the Art-sense when Ness fights hippies in the park and calls his dad on the phone to save.

The Dark Knight: Such a Mind Fuck.

2008-08-01T15:53:00.004-04:00

Spoilers ahead. Do not read unless you have seen the movie, don't care, or like mind fucks.

So if you live in a country with an internet connection or movie theatres, it is more than likely you have, or someone you know has, seen "The Dark Knight". Directed by Christopher Nolan, now being called a creative genious, "The Dark Knight" has several preechy messages that some would call 'overbearing'.

But this is no review. This is a look at one of the main themes of the movie. Chaos Vs. Order. The history of such a battle is impossible to recite. In fact, it has been around since times long before humanity. This conflict has been in literature and mediums of information since nearly the dawn of intellectual thought. Hell, it was in Fire Emblem Radiant Dawn. Such a mind fuck.

The Dark Knight himself, Batman, is the order. Christian Bale plays the part of Bruce Wayne, puts on his costume, gets strep throat, and assaults all those who do not follow the laws or morals he believes in. He is Order. The quintessential super hero that appeals to all our good feelings.

Chaos is presented in the form of "The Joker". Heath Ledger's act was, with no debate, an astonishing performance. He absolutely redefined the way people would see the Joker, and in many ways, himself. People saw him as a teenage actor or homosexual (not that there is anything wrong with that). However, the character himself is vastly flawed.

The Joker represents chaos. Yet... He is essentially heralded as being a mastermind of crime. A chaotic mastermind. That is the definition of an oxymoron.

Courtesy of Dictionary.com:
ox·y·mo·ron
a figure of speech by which a locution produces an incongruous, seemingly self-contradictory effect, as in “cruel kindness” or “to make haste slowly.”

cha·os
a state of utter confusion or disorder; a total lack of organization or order.

mas·ter·mind

1. to plan and direct (a usually complex project or activity), esp. skillfully: Two colonels had masterminded the revolt. –noun

2. a person who originates or is primarily responsible for the execution of a particular idea, project, or the like: the masterminds of company policy.

There really isn't much else to say from this point. The character is just simply flawed, but discretely. The movie is still a 5/5. And at the end of the day, not to cheapen the movie, a major amount of people went because a certain cast member died.

Still, don't call "The Dark Knight" intellectually stimulating, life changing, deep, etcetera. It is a super hero movie with a good director, who has nice writers using powerful word choice. It is still for the special effects and bad ass moments. And maybe to be inspired to do a little good.

And Harvey Dent obtains Big Boss Facecamo.

"a little gift from tentacles."

Mr. Game And Romance's Plan Of Action

2008-07-31T11:54:00.006-04:00

Game and Romance, what does it stand for?

The character so many of us grew up with, Mr. Game and Watch, brings fond memories of tossing sausage and rescuing people dropping from the sky. Simply, he is a true hero.

Romance. Where does this come from in the name? Well, I think love is pretty great, as well as the act of Romance (romancing, loving, etc.)

Now the twist. Game AND Romance. A double meaning, no? Game is what many 'cool' guys call the act of seduction in the use of a person. Ala, "Shit, Tyrone has game. He nailed Shaniqua the night he met her." Of course, you already know this becuase, you too, are real cool. So, Mr. Game and Romance makes perfect sense, no?

Up to this point, I have yet to post anything. As of now, this will change. Since this is a post it is clear that I have, infact, posted.

So where am I going with this, what am I doing, why am I posting in the first place?

Mostly to post helpful tutorials and sooner or later, game reviews.

A little about me first. I am at work, not doing work. Effectively, I am asking you, my internet friend, to please forgive me on my language if it falls anything short of stellar.

What I plan on bringing is tutorials that I use on a daily basis from around the net. Most of this will start of with PS3 Linux tutorials (in Ubuntu 7.10). Reviews of products like the AX360 Gaming Headset and The Dog Island (Wii Version, Ps2 Version later). I will also bring great deal tips, including a "How to get a great Dolby Digital/Pro Logic 5.1 Surround System on the cheap."

Mostly this will be for referance for myself, and posts will most likely be sporadic. Hopefully Google will pick up on some of these keywords, and help anyone who was troubled by the same problems as me.

I like change

2008-06-24T11:56:00.005-04:00

I like change. I like when one day is beautiful and sunny, the next is dark and gloomy, and I'm left waiting for the storm.

ZSP on your side: The Bemani Files

2008-06-22T20:58:00.002-04:00

In a typical day of a coma recoveree, there is no more traumatic incident than a long awaited return to the chapel that once was, the arcade. One quadriplegic, brain dead man I had to pleasure of wheeling to an arcade was absolutely shocked when he returned to the arcade. And by him being shocked, I am just imagining he was shocked, because he couldn't make any noise which would give me an idea of his feelings. The only noise I heard from his direction was his dialysis machine whirring in disdain over the absense of a friendly Street Fighter 2 cartridge. This man who traded his parachute pants and crew cut for a lovely hopsital gown was in for even more of a shock. As I wiped his chin of the drool cascading from his mouth I approached the source of this revolution, and it was a revolution to behold. More substantial than the simple revolution of Earth around the Sun, or the Revolution that gave birth to our great nation, this was the Dance Dance Revolution.

At the time I was about to turn 12. I was about to learn of many things. Soon I would learn about the most vulgar things on Earth, those of which would be a catalyst for the bitter weaboo you know me as today. But before a man goes through changes, he must witness something burried with a unique aura of discovery. I was naive at the time, I hadn't even had my first pocky stick yet. As you can see, I was unprepared. I took my paralyzed partner to the arcade, as a 12 year old generally does on a summer day. When I got closer to the action I discovered a horrifying truth. The arcade had been over run by a strange type of person. As I plowed through a crowd with my bed ridden buddy, I discovered the object that the masses had chosen to hover around. It was that afforementioned Revolution. As I came close to it I heard a noise of a indechipherible nature. The background seemed to reflect something of a musical nature, but the forefront of this noise was spoken in some kind of code. As I looked around these people and observed their speech patterns they seemed to use this code in the syntax of the language that I had convinced myself I some how spoke. But as I heard new phrases added into my language I questioned whether I knew this language for certain.

I then began to look at the faces of these invaders an saw something amazing. These people had many deformaties. As I noticed this I thought they would be humbled, kind people. This was proven wrong though by a certain reaction to an action of mine. I saw all these people entranced by this strange machine and I decided I would try to play it. At first I waited for these fierce competitors to finish their rounds. As they finished I asked if I could try. They harshly pointed me to bunch of objects on a small piece of plastic. There I found coins, along with objects which they would not keep in the pockets of their cargo pants for fear it would hinder their scores. I then put my coins there. As my time to play dawned upon me I chose a fury of noise which I previously mentioned as in a code for which I could not understand. It turned out these were songs from the strange land of Japan. At the time I knew Japan as a place for nothing more than Toonami, but those around me knew it as the land of eternal happiness. As I played a song called Butterfly, a staple of the game, I began my descent down the minds of those around me. They all thought I was a scrub, and therefore did not want me near their auras of mastery. As I found myself over whelmed by a corruption of the NES power pad and a ton of arrows in every direction, I quickly moved around with no certain motive in mind. After my failure at one song, the fierce competitors quickly kicked me off, angry at me for interupting their monopoly of the machine which had been transpiring all day. I then tried to put my coins in their appropriate spot, but were quickly returned to me. As I tried to play again I was repeatedly told that I had my time. Fed up, I moved away, with my brain dead man and quickly came to a conclusion. Arcades suck now, and they are dominated solely by Bemani machines and the sad souls who exclusively play them. As I walked away from the nest of cargo pants and keychains I felt enlightened. I had experienced something amazing. It was a growing pain on the long way to adulthood. I stared in the closed eyes of the man in the wheelchair. His beard was full much like that of Street Fighter's Zangief. With that in mind, I wheeled him over the Marvel Vs. Capcom machine, away from the smells of sweat and pocky.

- Proportionately Sliced Chinese Cuisine.

EarthBound Zero

2008-05-04T00:01:00.004-04:00

Perhaps you ponder why you have no girlfriend or life. I have that answer already. Also, that is Earthbound Zero running on my NES. Don't tell Reggie, I couldn't take him in a cage fight.

Vageta Stevens Webcom #1

2008-04-29T17:43:00.005-04:00

The 10 Hottest Girls of Gaming

2008-04-24T20:14:00.008-04:00

Jade Raymond is simply one of the most prolific icons of gaming in our time. She has struggled past adversity, deadlines, and heartbreaks, and still looks good! She's dealt with sexism, racism, hatred, stalkers, and more, just because of who she is and what she does. If you still don't believe in Jade, please read on so that I may enlighten you.

I. The Girl Behind the Games
Jade Raymond was borne in Canada, which most people dismiss. Jade Raymond did not dismiss Canada. She embraces all cultures and religions, as is evidenced in her masterpiece Assassin's Creed, which I will discuss later, for other matters are at hand right now.

When young Jade Raymond was growing up, she worked at a hospital night shift to earn money and make the world a better place. Her devotion to the people of the world is what makes her such an amazing Girl in Gaming. She then went on to program an online Jeopardy game singlehandedly; the feat would not be equaled.

After success such as this, Jade knew it was time to move up in the world. She started by making an online version of The Sims, which is the most popular game in the history of gaming according to several studies. Jade then moved on to G4, the Gamer's channel of choice. Her eloquent style of speech and beautifully crafted body brought Gamers everywhere to near tears; this was the messiah of gaming we had all been waiting for.

After several years of working at G4, Jade Raymond realized that she was being held back. She then decided to make Assassin's Creed. As you already know, it is one of the most well crafted games of all time, although admittedly it is still just a game, and as is such can't aspire to the loftier title of 'Art.'

Assassin's Creed is a mixture of accurate crusade-era combat, pulse pounding high-rise acrobatics, shallow breath inducing stealth,
and one of the most original and thought-provoking stories to ever grace the medium we know as "Gaming." In simpler words, it is a reflection of a part of Jade Raymond's life.

Jade Raymond is one part Chinese, one part Australian, two parts Canadian and one part videogame. Altair is a also a very unique and complicated character, as he comes from the Middle East and is an assassin, which is very mysterious. He must overcome the challenges of guards, templars, and beggers, while Jade Raymond must overcome sexism and stalker fanboys. To look into one is to glance into the other; the game is truly a masterful autobiography of a very complicated woman.

Jade Raymond also is very good looking.

Random Game Review: Super Wagyan Land

2008-04-24T18:54:00.002-04:00

This game is perhaps one of the great hybrid games ever made. You may be thinking of Hybrid Heaven, and Jade Empire right now, but you should throw away those thoughts immediately. Wagyan Land, loosely translated as Caterpie's Adventure, is the best hybrid game ever. It's one part generic platform, one part animal guessing game, one part video game, and a dash of Japanese reading. The Japanese reading and animal guessing parts defeated me swiftly. I knew they would be fierce foes that my day of katakana study could not defeat. Speaking of Katakana, our hero, caterpie keeps foes at bay with his Katakana Bimu(Katakana Beam). He shoots the beam and is able to save himself. You may be saying, what of Caterpie's String Shot? Not to be found, this game is a preview of the new Pokemon game coming out for the DS, where Caterpie has a Katakana attack. This game was made in the early 90's before Pokemon, and yet foretells the series direction. A testament to brilliance.
The story of this game is that Dr.Wily created his first robot master, Caterpie. He sends Caterpie on a quest to learn Japanese and guess animal names in Japanese. This game is an allegory of the average American otaku's life. Trying to learn Japanese is one goal in this game, as it is a goal for your average otaku. This game is amazing in the way it blends the backstory of Dr.Wily in his early robot building and the future of the Pokemon series with attacks of Japanese characters being utilized.

Score: 8/10, it gets alot of points for being a great hybrid game and being an advanced indicator of gaming's past and future, but is still just a video game. I'd rather have sex with 12 year olds.

Dashed Siamang Convict #: 323412664

Music Review: Parmore - Riot! (Limited Edition)

2008-04-24T10:17:00.005-04:00

For this limited edition there were only 14 copies ever made, luckily I sweet talked the lead singer for a copy ;)

The album starts off with a booming beginning and doesn't stop. Hits like "Misery Business" and "Hallelujah" are a sure fire hits ready to rock. While Songs like "That's What You Get" and "Miracle" are anthems of our generation. The list goes on and on throughout Paramore's discography. A great description of the album comes from the albums producer, David Bendeth: "A sudden outburst of uncontrolled emotion".

"Your arms like towers, tower over me" sings spunky young lead vokill'st Hayley Williams on "We Are Broken". Lyrics like these make you really think, ya know? The #1 track, "Crushcrushcrush" will take you by storm. It is the culmination of everything Paramore. "Fences" ain't bad either. Doesn't mean this album is flawless. "Born For This" clearly steals a lyric from Swedish hardcore/punk reclaimers Refused's "Liberation Frequency". Which causes an epic "face palm".

At the end of the day, this is simply not art like Final Fantasy VII, Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty, or Ikaruga. It's just a damn good record. 8/10. Paramore should focus more on IHOP shows in my area than sassy music videos and snappy one-liners. They're not the new Brand New.

-The Boy with The Sky On His Shoulders, Dan CiTi

Info:
Length: 38:47
Label: Fueled By Ramen, Atlantic
Producer(s): David Bendeth, John Janick
Band members:
Vocals/Lyrics: Hayley Williams
Guitar/Music: Josh Farro
Bass: Jeremy Davis
Drums: Zac Farro
cover art:

track listing:
01. For A Pessimist, I'm Pretty Optimistic 03:48
02. That's What You Get 03:41
03. Hallelujah 03:24
04. Misery Business 03:32
05. When It Rains 03:35
06. Let The Flames Begin 03:18
07. Miracle 03:30
08. Crushcrushcrush 03:09
09. We Are Broken 03:38
10. Fences 03:19
11. Born For This 03:59
LE exclusive content:
12. When It Rains (Demo) 03:24
13. Misery Business (Acoustic): Live From Q101 Chicago 03:17
14. Pressure (Acoustic): Live From Q101 Chicago 03:02
15. For A Pessimist, I'm Pretty Optimistic (Live From London 03:59
16. Born For This (Live From London) 04:20
B-Sides:
01. Rewind (Demo)
02. Stop This Song (Lovesick Melody)
03. My Hero (Electronic Remix)
04. Decoy
05. Temporary (Demo)

RIYL: Boys Like Girls, The Rocket Summer, cute chicks singing average pop-punk, teen music, Fueled By Ramen-style pop-punk, crushes, and overall RIOTS!

Grounded: Discovering the Essence of SSBB

2008-04-17T11:11:00.002-04:00

I have been grounded because I am failing statistics. Statistically I should be getting worse at SSBB, but in fact I have progressed extensively in the zen of the game. I have sat for hours with my detached controler studying its delicate curves. I squeezed the controller with my mighty arms creating impressions in it with my fingers. The controller has now melded perfectly with my hands. I have now come into contact with the inner cerebrum of the controller. We have agreed that it is in our best interests to continue our joint ownership. Now when I say ownership I mean: OWNING OTHER PEOPLE. My controller and I have had a successful ownership since we discovered Diddy Kong, Zelda, Donkey Kong, and Bowser to submit to our playing styles perfectly. In my contact with the cerebrum I am now able to play SSBB without a console. My mind is my console. I have defeated many a foe, and the wonderful thing is my server is not at all laggy because of my perfect inter-brainial connection. I now have graduated from my apprenticeship the console and have finally achieved my zero-suit potential.

I am now a master brawler.

Thank you and goodnight,
Your beast is finally happy.

Random Game Review (SNES)

2008-04-09T19:00:00.013-04:00

Note: These screens may not look bad, but remember anything looks good in a lower resolution, even I'd look studly on one DS screen. If you don't buy the fact this game will send your retinas to the shadow realm, ask Pegasus, or "import" it.

Mazinger Z is a game based on a giant robot anime from the 1970's. If you don't know about it, read a paragraph about it and become an instant anime sage. Naruto headbands will fall off heads. That being said, this game is perhaps one the worst looking games on the SNES. It may not be the dizzying mode-7 headache known as NHL Stanley Cup, but it looks like they ported a shitty robot side scroller from the NES. In fact, this is a shitty robot side scroller made for the SNES. Pretty sad that they decided to make this game for the SNES just because that was the edict in 93' for developers who wanted to seem relevant.

Basically this game has a generic punch combo after mashing the buttons, a jump button, and a weapon you can use by pressing up while punching. This weapon comes in handy, but most of the times the enemies belly flop onto you and you get hit back. Even in the middle of your punch combos you get belly flopped on. This game is about bellyflopping. I played 2 minutes of it and got belly flopped. This inspired me to do core exercises. I'll get back to you guys on that.

Score: Gets a 1/10, point comes from the Z after Mazinger, I like adding letter to the ends of things.

-Dashed Siamang X

Pics Fr Sd Kidz

2008-03-30T22:27:00.002-04:00

pictures for sad children, or pfsc is about a tale of journeymen that live in their daily lives doing and dealing with everyday things that we can all relate to.

Cool Stuff

2008-03-22T21:32:00.007-04:00

Here's a some cool stuff I have:

The Force Unleashed

2008-03-20T19:07:00.008-04:00

Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken.
The Force shall free me.

Pussy and Headshots

2008-03-11T22:38:00.015-04:00

Gamers these days are not the nerds of yesterday. They are cool and hip and can headshot you while carrying on an intense AIM conversation with girls while using more hilarious youtube links and movie references than the N word in a Halo match. Today preps run in fear of their mouse and keyboard overlords. It's as Socrates once said, who needs a car when you can drive a Warthog.
You may ask yourself, why haven't I seen these so called cool gamers, and it is a simple answer, they have hidden themselves among you. Carrying over their stealth skills from intense COD4 multiplayer sessions, they have assimilated themselves among normal people. As you can see, they are more dangerous than an AWP. At this moment, they are among you, quoting American Pie, but behind closed doors they are the most revered members of their Steam servers.

Cool gamers are very good at what they do and they know a great method of accomplishing their methods; quite simply, they plan ahead. They congregate to their lan parties after watching hours of youtube videos and memorizing kind of funny quotes they can use in conversation with that moderately cute girl who laughs at their jokes sometimes. It is at these lan parties they plan how they conduct themselves in school. They come up with guidelines like no talking about video games in school. Meticulous in execution, they pull this off with the utmost ease. Like a perfect Ghost Recon run, they execute avoiding the subject of video games like Fox News avoids the truth. They may have a singular goal of getting laid, a novel pursuit for most, but they go to great lengths to accomplish this goal. They will accomplish all the steps required to drive a car in the fastest time possible. They get their license within mere months and begin their rise to sitting a few tables away from the popular table as opposed to the corner. They put their skills to the test after years of Midnight Club training. They'll drive a 95 Pontiac Solstice while the newest Indie album plays, not only showcasing their superiority in driving, but music as well. They will dress like the guy from the Mac commercials, showing they are indeed casual and cool, perhaps the ultimate team. They will merge all these elements together into the perfect package, and then they'll log 1000s of hours on X Fire.
The cool gamer a new trend that has yet to pass the test of time. As time goes on, they may crack under the pressure of socialization, perhaps the only thing more intense than Major League Gaming. Until that day though, they'll have a better Last.FM than you, and a better Kill Ratio.

May your LANs never dull,
Dashed Siamang.

BRIDGER STRIKES (banana games etc.)

2008-03-10T22:45:00.009-04:00

Hi my name is Bridger and I am a bananaholic. A bananaholic is someone who sporatically uses bananas to mind game others in SSBB.

Banana games are some of the best games in the world. I play them on the triple and the xbox circle. When the owners of these systems find banana peels resting innocently on the top of their systems they are all like wtf! and then they slip on the bananas.

I come over after they slip and I'm all like LOL banana games! And proceed to do a clapping taunt and scream BRIDGER STRIKES AGAIN!

Most people can't handle banana games. Especially fags like fox and marth. who with their speed pretend like they can be sooo coool but then they end up on their asses and I come over after they slip and I'm all like LOL banana games! And proceed to do a clapping taunt and scream BRIDGER STRIKES AGAIN!

hmm this seems to happen a lot.

Today in school I dropped a banana on the ground and proceeded to slip on it. I come over after I slipped and I'm all like LOL banana games! And proceeded to do a clapping taunt and scream BRIDGER STRIKES AGAIN!

hmm this seems to happen a lot.

So basically to wrap up this post. I say "with great power comes great responsibility". Donkey Kong once told me this. Therefore I use my banana peels extremely concientiosly hoping that someday I will be honored for my banana talent.

Thank you and goodnight,

Bridger (the Beast) Langfur

Destined Meeting

2008-03-08T09:23:00.002-05:00

Dear blogging,

I've gazed at you from afar, admired your pseudo-intellectualism, heard you mentioned by brain dead baby boomers, and had many flings with your hotter older sister "podcasting". Despite my shyness and your inadequateness, it is you I love. Like Troy for the East High Wildcats, you have sunk a game winning shot, right into my heart. Alas, I may not win over Gabriella and Charpay, but I will win at confessing to you. Here's to you blogging, Here's to you.

Love,
Sliced Asian Gourmet

...And So It Begins

2008-03-08T04:20:00.005-05:00

Hello, I am Dan CiTi. I am here to finish the fight, write music reviews, and many other things. I can't wait to hit you guys & gals with my best shot.

Super Smash Bros. Brawl Review

2008-03-07T00:57:00.008-05:00

Truly, what is a game? A piece of fun, a piece of magic? Super Smash Brothers Brawl by Nintendo is something that can be treasured by everyone. With over 20 new characters and more than 30 levels, this fighter is one of a kind and tons of fun. Returning characters include the Super Mario Brothers, Zelda, Fox, and pokemon. There is a such a big selection of challengers that everyone can be pleased by their options.

My favorite returning character is Sonic the hedgehog. His speed is unparalleled and his attacks are one of a kind. Snake is also a great character, because for example he uses explosives in a battlefield of fists and magic.

It is also worth noting that the new Subspace Emissary mode is both a challenge and a delight. I had to play on easy mode because normal mode had some balancing issues since some of the bigger enemies could kill my avatar in a few hits, but it was still somewhat challenging. I really liked the final battle with the rainbow fighter, whose name is still unknown in English. Hopefully this will be rectified for the upcoming English release of the game.

The biggest addition to the game is the advent of the impressive new final smashes. Some characters get unimpressive ones, like Ike, whose final smash is simply an unavoidable instant kill on a nearbye enemy. But, with final smashes like Fox's Landmaster Tank, it is very possible to get 4-5 kills on your enemy before your time runs out. This is a very good addition to the game, since it brings elements of racing games or shooters into the realm of smash bros that was never before imagined. I have heard rumors of more characters that could use this landmaster final smash, but unfortunately I have not unlocked them by the time of this review. I will update all of you further if any more news of this comes to me.

All in all, this game is an amazing work of fun entertainment. There are fun new characters, like Ash, and Purin, who is almost the same as Jigglypuff, who doesn't seem to be in this installment. The only qualms I have are with the small roster, which is barely even 28 characters. On top of that, the character selection screen makes no sense, since characters don't line up correctly, which can get confusing. The online mode also seems to be lacking, since an obnoxiously long friend number is required to be entered by both parties, which is quite frankly too much of a hassle to even bother with.

This is one of the funnest games I've ever played. The sound, animations, graphics, and controls are all top notch. Unfortunately, this is simply a game. It doesn't transform the industry in any way or form, unlike earlier epics such as as Final Fantasy VII and Metal Gear Solid 2: the Suns of Liberty, both of which can be defined as art. SSB:B, however, is simply a game. And as it is no more than just a game, it will receive from me an 8/10. If Nintendo focuses more on immersive gameplay and industry innovation instead of cheap laughs and 3rd party characters, they may have a hit on their hands for the next Super Smash Bros game. But at the moment, it is just a well polished fighting game with a few obscure characters.

RATING: 8/10
Pros: Lots-a stages, stellar music, controls are rock solid
Cons: Simple in many respects, could use a few anime characters (seriously Nintendo read this!!)
BOTTOM LINE: Worth a rent if you are looking for a fun brawler, worth a buy if you have a some easily amused friends.

A Dawn of My Memories

2008-03-06T23:11:00.002-05:00

Hello internet. My name is Vageta Stevens.

This blog will be here to present you with news, reviews, blogs, images, faqs, previews, interviews, stories, user content, emergent gameplay, dating sim reviews and news, super smash bros brawl metagame explanations, hip hop culture, dating techniques, and possibly music reviews.

I cannot tell you how long I have dreamed of this moment.

As history turns,
let it pass.

-Vageta Stevens